Docz' Hole

as if I've actually changed, anyway.

Rugby gave me a really good boost. I felt good to be out there, starting, being a real player, finally good enough. I needed it and I'm glad it came. The beginning of the year was really some of the hardest times I've been through emotionally. Taking out the first girl I've ever liked and then learning of her unrequited whatever it was I had really hurt me. I cried and I feel it was ok to do so. I had exams coming up and universities to apply ...

i am going to hang myself lool

I don't want to fall asleep tonight. I mean I almost can't fall asleep. I want to see what will happen in the future but I doubt I've very ready for it. My heart is beating, either due to caffeine or the fact I can not wait to see how everything will unfold

I messed it up somewhere
My knee sometimes makes cracking/poping noises, my hip does too
and my left foot is extremely flat and angled out
life sucks

And they brought in football

I'll be playing on the line and it scares me I can ruck in rugby, I can hit the rucks hard, I hit every one I can because I love doing it, but I'm not so sure I can push someone from a stand still stance
my life is ruined